How to help your children move from primary to secondary school

Moving schools can be a very exciting, but sometimes slightly daunting time for your children and for you. 

There are lots of things to think about, try to encourage your child to talk to you about how they’re feeling and share any questions they might have. Plus, make sure you're also talking to supportive members of your friends and family too as this is a big change for you too.

  • What happens on the first day? 

  • What shall I pack in my school bag? 

  • Will I make new friends? 

  • How much homework will I have? 

  • How will I get to school?

  • Did you enjoy secondary school? 

  • What happens if I feel anxious or shy?

Change affects everyone differently. Encourage your child to be open with how they're feeling and not to bottle things up – it’s ok to be happy, scared, excited, worried, nervous and shy, all at the same time. You may not have all the answers when your child asks and its okay to say that you’ll find out the answer. 

  • If you've been unable to visit the school, show your child their new school's website so they know what the school looks like, where the entrances are and how they get around the site.
  • Talk to them about their new teacher and new subjects they'll be learning.
  • Ask them how they're feeling, what they're looking forward to, what they might be nervous about, who they already know when they start from their old school etc.
  • Be a good listener, it is very normal for your child to be nervous about new surroundings, even more so since the pandemic.
  • Supply your child with tips on how to make new friends - maybe arm them with a couple of questions to help build new relationships - where do you live, what did you do over the summer holidays, what sports do you like etc?
  • Explore relaxation techniques together; taking deep breaths, thinking of their happy place. See the further resources for more mindfulness techniques.
  • Show your child the BBC Bitesize website, which has lots of top tips from other children and teachers that your children will be able to relate to.

Online courses, counselling and advice 

  • Have you noticed that your child is staying up later, feeling more sensitive or and seems to be much more grumpy? These are all normal feelings for older children and a sign of their developing brain. You could suggest to your child they take an online course where they can find out more about these changes. The course is called Understanding your teenage brain. Access your free course using the code: Invicta 
  • KOOTH is a safe space to talk to someone or share what’s on your mind. You can find support from the KOOTH community and browse through a selection of self-help articles or talk to an emotional well-being counsellor.
  • Text ChatHealth on 07520 618850 if you're worried about anything and need support or advice. We can support your child anonymously and confidentially with exam stress, feeling sad or worried, sexual health, body image concerns, and healthy lifestyle advice.

Useful websites